The Books

What began as an idea for a single book grew into a series that ended up having fifteen books, a spinoff series, a boxed set, a dictionary, and plans for the next generation.

September 2022 made 9 years since I first met Christopher Caldwell, whom I discovered later went by the road name of Outlaw. Our introduction came via a dream. I didn’t know much about him. He was quite tall, very well-built, and oozing sex. He had green eyes, black hair, a Harley, and a cut with a frightening Grim Reaper as the middle rocker. Scary for me because since the age of eight or nine, I’ve had nightmares about the Grim Reaper coming for me as I waited alone in a bedroom. My first reaction when I awakened was: what that mean? Yes, I said exactly those words. My next reaction was his name Christopher. Years ago, I dated a guy named Christopher who had green eyes, but he didn’t have black hair and he didn’t ride a motorcycle. My next reaction to the dream was: what the ever-loving fuck was that?

As dreams go, this one was remarkable because I remembered it. Most of them are forgotten. Very few stay with me. I can count on one hand (and maybe an additional finger from the other hand) the dreams I don’t forget. Ever. I thought my dream about Christopher Caldwell was a throwaway. I recalled it because of certain coincidences. But he didn’t go away. The motherfucker stayed. He was persistent, demanding, memorable. Two weeks later I gave in to him, sat down at my computer and listened to his story.

At the time, I didn’t expect that one, nameless book to turn into 15 books of sex, revenge, betrayal and, most of all, love. Johnnie was just Christopher’s cousin, a big, sexy biker competing for Megan. His history and his grandfather’s tainted love were unknown to me. What I did know was he and Christopher shared women, and Johnnie took it as a given that it would always be so, even when he found a woman he refused to share. I also knew he was Christopher’s complete opposite, charming, carefree, and college educated. He was also a man that caught Meggie’s attention, in spite of her feelings for Christopher. As a matter of fact, for a brief time, I considered a completely different outcome. Meggie ended up with Johnnie, and Christopher would go with Kiera.

Today, in the here and now, I can’t imagine that outcome or a continuation of the series.

Love triangles are controversial. Subverting reader expectations are even worse. One of my absolute favorite series was the Francesca Cahill novels by Brenda Joyce. It began with one hero and slowly introduced a competitor. By the end of the series, I was torn over which hero I wanted Francesca with. Calder Hart had begun as the villain but ended up being darkly charismatic. He lured me into his spell as much as he did Francesca, even as we still clung to and loved the upstanding Rick Bragg.

Once a hero, always a hero, and Christopher was Meggie’s. Yet, emotions are complex, the nucleus of love. Emotions are messy, drawing us in even when we want to turn away.

As I met each of the characters in Misled, I wasn’t aware of Mortician and Digger’s history and how they’d grown up. Val and Zoann’s individual traumas were unknown to me. Big Joe was the father Meggie admired and needed so she could save her mother, and the man Christopher despised because of who he’d become. Kendall Miller wouldn’t be truly known to me for another six months.

Christopher, Johnnie, Mortician, Digger, Val, Stretch, Big Joe, and K-P gave me enough of their history to tell Meggie’s story. As the years went on and each character revealed more and more of themselves, I began to consider going back to book one to add scenes as well as other POVs. The idea came and went, but I never acted on it. I thought I did Meggie an injustice by only mentioning in one or two sentences that she called the police for Thomas, but Dinah always sent them away. I realized her reasons for staying and the help she tried to get for her mother had been glossed over, so sometimes didn’t register.

Johnnie, once such a beloved character, needed a little more clarity. A paragraph or two telling about his time with Meggie hit much differently than actually showing it.

Questions such as, ‘why did Meggie believe Kiera meant so much to Outlaw’, ‘why was Snake at the mall’, ‘what was Outlaw doing while Meggie was in the hospital’, also struck me. Of course, there’s no way I could ever address all the questions, comments, and points of contention or disbelief that’s out there. It is just impossible and unrealistic, but some things bothered me too, even as the end of the series finally arrived and something else I hadn’t intended came into existence—plans for a next generation.

When Misled was released in December 2013, I was so ecstatic. I know Amazon lists the date as December 19, 2013, but the original date was the 5th of December, then Amazon pulled it. It took another 14 days before it was listed on the site again.

11 months after Misled’s release, my grandmother died. 20 months after, I was diagnosed with Stage 2b HER2 Positive breast cancer. At the 21-month mark, I developed a severe bacterial infection from the port. By 25 months, my doggie died. She would’ve been 14 that summer; I still miss her. 26 months after Misled I went through 11 ½ hours of surgery. Two weeks before Misled’s 3rd anniversary, I rang the bell. It was one of the best days of my life. Yet, I don’t think my life ever truly returned to what it had been prior to my cancer diagnosis.

It affected my three daughters terribly. It was also the beginning of my mother’s (Memaw Kelly) memory lapses. The coming years also saw her decline physically.

Real-life pulled me from my world of bikers and revenge.

As depression is wont to do, I also suffered major bouts. In my teens, I was diagnosed with Major Depressive Disorder with suicidal ideations.

Yet, my characters, Christopher especially, wouldn’t allow me to let go of them. My readers, my beautiful people, sent me words of encouragement and checked in on me. Some of you still do. Misfit was supposed to wrap up the saga of the Death Dwellers. But Roxy tapped me on the shoulder and wanted her own HEA. Next, Jordan’s story needed telling. Christopher got a little jealous and decided he needed a Valentine’s story. Finally, Roxy wanted to know if Knox would ever marry her.

When I released Misrule in August 2019, I fully intended to drop Reckless within a few months. Then, Covid happened, and the world screeched to a halt.

It should’ve been easy to finish Reckless. Instead, my girls’ depression worsened, and my mother’s vertigo returned, along with bouts of asthma, arthritis, and asthma. I didn’t have the time or the brain capacity to write. Not even for Christopher.

In early spring of 2021, things settled enough that my thoughts began to return. Most of all, Memaw got on my ass and told me to sit the fuck down and write. If you don’t fucking write, you’re not a damn writer.

So true.

I placed Reckless on preorder; I fully intended to release it in June 2021. Then, another shitstorm erupted. Suddenly, we were all going for tests, seeing doctors and therapists, and purchasing medications. My release date came and went. Depression returned.

As always, I managed to pull myself together and recalibrate. I jotted down notes and ideas for Reckless. I managed to read an entire book for the first time in over a year. Perhaps, even longer. Island Queen by Vanessa Riley was worth it, and I loved every word.

I read what I had of Reckless, 250 pages; then, I decided I needed to start from the beginning since I had some characters from the original series making cameos in Reckless. As I reread all 15 books, I saw corrections that needed to be done but had somehow been missed by several pairs of eyes. Dates and timelines needed to match, even motivations explained. There were also details in the original series that needed to be clarified, tweaked, or expanded upon to fit what was in Reckless.

Yes, I’m aware Reckless isn’t released yet, so it would’ve been easier to edit that story rather than the original series. However, I’ve long wanted new covers. It wasn’t until I saw a segment from Stephen Colbert naming a man who sometimes modeled for romance covers being involved in the January 6th nightmare that I felt it became imperative. Mr. Colbert broadcast several covers with the guy’s image, and I was crushed that my title wasn’t amongst them. I don’t want to be accused of supporting his beliefs by not taking him off the cover. Updating the original series as well as the covers appealed to me.

Besides, there were whole generations that needed accounting. Enemies of the fathers, thus enemies of the sons. Some of the guest appearances in Reckless would make more sense if I went back to the original story and rewrote bits and pieces.

So, in preparation for the release of Reckless, and then the Death Dweller Legacy books, I am updating the original 15 books. Reckless IS coming. It is now 475 pages. I should be wrapping it up soon, so the final page count is unknown. But like Misfit, this motherfucker keeps growing and growing, too.

In closing, I want to thank you.  

THANK YOU for taking a chance and I hope you enjoy it. If you have read my books before, thank you for your continued support. Most of all, thank you for your prayers, well-wishes, encouragement, and patience.

Ain’t nothin’ but a thing.